So I suck as a mommy blogger. I just don't know what to write about lol. I guess I can give a little update on us.
Jillian is 10.5 months now. Yeah.. Like 10 months 2 weeks and 3 days old. Holy shit. She is WALKING. She typically eats three solid meals a day and nurses before naps/bed and usually once in the night around 4-6am. She sleeps from about 7am til 4-6 and then back down until 7-8am. She talks all of the time but she still doesn't know any real words. She has 3 teeth. She got her first two the first week in Nov and she cut her first top tooth a few days ago. She has been sick twice in her lifetime. She had RSV in December and now she has a stomach bug that has been going around. She's a lot of fun. I can and do watch her play and explore all day long! I love being her mom so so much!
So much so that we decided to add another in the mix!
I am 4w2d with hopefully our second take home baby. I found out Saturday at 11DPO for sure. I had taken a test the night before bc we were having company over and I knew I'd have a few drinks. It was a stupid wondfo and it looked negative and was taking forever to develop so I left and went to enjoy my company. I didn't see the line until the next day so I took a FRER and it was positive! Cue: freak out. I ran to JoAnns and got an iron on transfer that says "I'm the big sister" to share with Keith. I will post all the pics and stuff another time bc they're on my phone.
No symptoms yet except heightened sense of smell. I thought my sore nipples were a pregnancy symptom but I've had them for almost two weeks so I think it was Jill's teething.
I'm pretty low on hope right about now. My tests aren't darkening up like Jill's did. I almost feel like I'm just waiting to start bleeding. I have had serious mood swings but not from happy to angry, but okay to weepy and depressed. I'm having a really hard time. I want this baby so badly. We have been NTNP (but really we've likely hit at least one day in the FW for the last 5 cycles). I had tested negative at 8 and 9DPO and I washed my diva cup and talked to Keith about probably TTA until after our vacation at the end of summer. I was surprised to see that line the morning of 11DPO. In hindsight, I should have known better bc my LP has been 8 days or shorter since I started OPKs back in Sept (didn't use them in Oct but did the other months).
There was a post on TB with some great mantras to inspire hope and positive thinking and I'm going to post them here for myself and for anyone that might be reading (likely no one since I haven't blogged since.. wow since August!)
Today I am pregnant and I love my baby
I am pregnant until someone tells me otherwise
My past does not dictate my future. A previous miscarriage does not mean I will have another miscarriage
Hope does not make bad things happen. You cannot jinx your pregnancy by getting excited or telling someone. Live in the positive.
There is nothing I can do to prevent a miscarriage from happening. Worrying myself sick will not prevent a miscarriage. And if it were to happen again, I know I will survive.
The last one really speaks to me. I am crying now even thinking about it happening again, but I know I will survive. I hope things will be different now that I have Jill if something bad does happen. I can't be that person I was before I got pregnant with Jill and after my second miscarriage. I was obsessed. I was so incredibly enveloped in my own grief to care about myself or anyone/anything else. That's not an option this time. I have to be the best mother I can be for Jill. I cannot keep going to that dark place. That same place I am struggling so hard to stay out of even now with all of this unknown. Next time, I think I'm going to have Keith ration tests out to me when trying so I can test and get a positive and then leave it at that. I cannot help myself and I have already taken a million tests in the 5 whole days I've known I'm pregnant.
If this baby doesn't come home with me in October, I do not plan on trying again until I can find a doctor that will run tests on me to make sure my body is not causing these losses. I got some good recommendations for a doctor about 30min away that is supposedly really sympathetic to those with losses and is very understanding and helpful. I hope I get to see her for my early pregnancy though instead of for loss testing, but I'm thankful to have a lead on a good doctor either way. I was hoping to give birth in the birth center here, but if I cannot transfer a little later in my pregnancy, then I will just have another hospital birth. My birth with Jill wasn't bad at all so I'm okay with that. (The center only takes a small number of patients due around a certain time bc they have a limited amount of staff).
Anyways, Jill is fussing. Maybe I will start a pregnancy update thing like last time when I feel a little more confident. If I can make it until 6w, then I will feel a little better. I will also try to update with appt dates and any other news
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Breastfeeding week
I have a serious love-hate relationship with breastfeeding. It is something I have always looked forward to when pregnant. I always wanted to provide "the best" for my baby.
When you are pregnant with your first, it is so hard to even imagine the emotional roller coaster you are about to face. Not that I had the hardest struggle ever, but I feel like after losing my two babies, I only ever pictured the absolute bliss that comes with motherhood and having a baby. I am not in any way saying that I am not head over heals for Jillian. My entire life revolves around this little girl, but that is something I love and something I struggle with.
My problem is I feel like I have spent the last few years trying to have a baby, then 9mo preparing for her arrival, and now my life is all about trying to keep her happy. I have a high needs baby in the sense that she is practically 100% dependent on attention, distractions, and the like. I am no longer "Jess" but I am "Jillian's mom." That's the best way I can describe it. I happily live to make her smile or giggle, but somedays it is hard.
Some of those days make me hate breastfeeding. I am sorry, but it isn't all puppies and rainbows. It is hard. Jill doesn't take a bottle. At all. I am solely responsible for feeding her every hour and a half to two hours. I absolutely love it and I absolutely hate it. I don't get a break. It wasn't an issue in the beginning, but after almost 5 months, I am struggling to have my own identity again.
I don't write this for pity. I love looking down at my little girl when she is drowsy from eating. I love knowing I am the only one who can truly calm her at my breast, I love seeing her grow and knowing I raised her from a few cells to an apple seed to a blueberry to a banana to a watermelon to my 14.5 lb baby girl that laughs and smiles and tries so hard to talk! I just miss me. I write this on the off chance that someone else feels like I do and needs to know they are not alone. I am doing what someone else cannot for my girl and it is hard but it is beautiful.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Week 1
Alright, I haven't lost weight (as I suspected I wouldn't) so I think I will check my stats every 3 weeks or a month.
Last week, I started Focus T25 and I love it so far (I just completed day 2 of my second week)! I wasn't feeling Jillian Michael's 30 Day shred and Shaun T is exactly what I needed!
I completed all of week one except the second cardio. I did Kenpo X from p90x with my husband on my rest day instead! Also, after doing cario yesterday, I did Ab Ripper X with my husband too! I'm pretty proud of myself.
Jill has been amazing so far. I usually get dressed and ready for my work out and then I nurse and rock Jill to sleep in her room. I have usually exactly 30 min to get my work out done (which is why I get ready before putting her down bc the girl is like a stop watch!). When Keith and I did Kenpo X (an hour work out) she was amazing in her jumperoo just watching and jumping along with us! So far, I am really proud of myself. I am glad I am starting with shorter work outs bc it is easier to stick with it knowing how fast 25 minutes passes!
Anyways, I am sort of embarrassed of my before pics (Keith insisted I do them with my shirt up to see better results) so I think I will save them to show when I've made progress and am a little prouder of my body.
I will leave you with a pic of Jillian so you have something to look at!
Last week, I started Focus T25 and I love it so far (I just completed day 2 of my second week)! I wasn't feeling Jillian Michael's 30 Day shred and Shaun T is exactly what I needed!
I completed all of week one except the second cardio. I did Kenpo X from p90x with my husband on my rest day instead! Also, after doing cario yesterday, I did Ab Ripper X with my husband too! I'm pretty proud of myself.
Jill has been amazing so far. I usually get dressed and ready for my work out and then I nurse and rock Jill to sleep in her room. I have usually exactly 30 min to get my work out done (which is why I get ready before putting her down bc the girl is like a stop watch!). When Keith and I did Kenpo X (an hour work out) she was amazing in her jumperoo just watching and jumping along with us! So far, I am really proud of myself. I am glad I am starting with shorter work outs bc it is easier to stick with it knowing how fast 25 minutes passes!
Anyways, I am sort of embarrassed of my before pics (Keith insisted I do them with my shirt up to see better results) so I think I will save them to show when I've made progress and am a little prouder of my body.
I will leave you with a pic of Jillian so you have something to look at!
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| This is the onesie I bought to announce my pregnancy to Keith! |
Monday, June 17, 2013
My heart..
Is so full. Every time I look at my beautiful daughter, I have trouble believing that this is my life. I am so blessed to have this amazing little girl in my life. All of my dreams came true March 13, 2013.
Monday, June 10, 2013
12w5d
Jillian will be 13 weeks on Wednesday and 3 months old on Thursday! Time really is flying so fast!
This is really just a short update to say we are doing well. Jill is showing a lot of interest in sitting up. Any time she is not completely flat on her back, she is straining trying to sit up (so if I prop her up on a pillow or my legs). She isn't rolling yet and she's not a huge fan of tummy time, but I am making more of an effort in the hopes that she will roll soon. She is cooing like crazy and she is reaching out and touching things (especially her toes!). I can't wait to hear her laugh! She squeals a little bit, but I haven't heard a giggle just yet.
She is also sleeping in the crib about 75% of the time. We tried a little before we visited family in Chicago and it didn't go too well. She was waking all night and during the day she was super cranky and acting over-tired. I decided to try again a few weeks later and she took to it like a champ and has been in there ever since. I say 75% of the time because if she wakes up after 4am then I usually change her and bring her back to her rock n play in our room for the remainder of the morning. She usually goes to bed some time between 9:15pm and 10:00pm and sleeps until 4-6am (one time she slept until 8!) and then I feed and change her and she's back in bed for 1-2 hour increments until 11-1pm depending. Sometimes she wants to play for an hour or so before taking another nap. During the day/evening, she stays up mainly and takes a cat nap every 2-2.5 hours for about 20-45min.
Breastfeeding is still going great. Jill eats every 1hr-2hrs all day (usually the more frequent times are in the evenings after 5pm). I feed her and rock her to sleep sometime after 9 and she's good for the night! She is starting to get frustrated at the breast and I'm thinking it is a growth spurt and the milk isn't coming out fast enough for her liking because she mainly fusses in the evening when my breasts feel the least full and she has yet to fuss at the breast in the morning or early afternoon.
Keith went back to work for real last week. He had been doing some odd things on and off (mainly off) in March and April until we took transfer leave to move. He pretty much had from March 1 to June 4 off. It was great for me, but now he's back at work. He hasn't started shift work yet and is working days until he gets assigned to a crew. We will see how that weird schedule works. So far, I have been pretty good during the days, but it will likely be hard when he works nights bc I can't just change Jill's and my schedule so we can spend time with him bc that'd be hard on us.
Anyways, Jill is fussing so I will probably have to go rock her a little bit more to get her to sleep ):
This is really just a short update to say we are doing well. Jill is showing a lot of interest in sitting up. Any time she is not completely flat on her back, she is straining trying to sit up (so if I prop her up on a pillow or my legs). She isn't rolling yet and she's not a huge fan of tummy time, but I am making more of an effort in the hopes that she will roll soon. She is cooing like crazy and she is reaching out and touching things (especially her toes!). I can't wait to hear her laugh! She squeals a little bit, but I haven't heard a giggle just yet.
She is also sleeping in the crib about 75% of the time. We tried a little before we visited family in Chicago and it didn't go too well. She was waking all night and during the day she was super cranky and acting over-tired. I decided to try again a few weeks later and she took to it like a champ and has been in there ever since. I say 75% of the time because if she wakes up after 4am then I usually change her and bring her back to her rock n play in our room for the remainder of the morning. She usually goes to bed some time between 9:15pm and 10:00pm and sleeps until 4-6am (one time she slept until 8!) and then I feed and change her and she's back in bed for 1-2 hour increments until 11-1pm depending. Sometimes she wants to play for an hour or so before taking another nap. During the day/evening, she stays up mainly and takes a cat nap every 2-2.5 hours for about 20-45min.
Breastfeeding is still going great. Jill eats every 1hr-2hrs all day (usually the more frequent times are in the evenings after 5pm). I feed her and rock her to sleep sometime after 9 and she's good for the night! She is starting to get frustrated at the breast and I'm thinking it is a growth spurt and the milk isn't coming out fast enough for her liking because she mainly fusses in the evening when my breasts feel the least full and she has yet to fuss at the breast in the morning or early afternoon.
Keith went back to work for real last week. He had been doing some odd things on and off (mainly off) in March and April until we took transfer leave to move. He pretty much had from March 1 to June 4 off. It was great for me, but now he's back at work. He hasn't started shift work yet and is working days until he gets assigned to a crew. We will see how that weird schedule works. So far, I have been pretty good during the days, but it will likely be hard when he works nights bc I can't just change Jill's and my schedule so we can spend time with him bc that'd be hard on us.
Anyways, Jill is fussing so I will probably have to go rock her a little bit more to get her to sleep ):
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
8w0d
Holy moly I haven't updated this in forever ): I have been so so busy with Jillian and the move. This probably won't be too long of an update.
Basically, we freaking love our house in SC! It's huge and relatively new (5 years old) and we have so much space! I will post pictures as we decorate it, but right now it is covered in boxes and crap that we haven't found a place for! I do have some pics of Jillian's room so far.
My child has been more than spoiled.. we are so so lucky to have been given almost every piece of clothing. This does not include any of her newborn clothes because she outgrew them (she has about as much NB as she does 3-6mo) or a good bunch that were in poor condition and I didn't have room for (like a whole box full...)
So Jillian is 8 weeks today! I don't have a scale that measures lbs and ounces, but today I weighed her (by me stepping on the scale alone and then with her and calculating the difference) and she weights 10.6lb! Breastfeeding is still going great. I have lost most of the feeling in my nipples lol. Sometimes I just let her stay on the boob even after she's done eating bc I love the cuddles and it doesn't hurt anymore!
Jill outgrew her newborn cloth diapers (well the Bumgenius ones she kept peeing out of so I'm assuming they didn't fit or weren't absorbent enough) right before we moved. She has been in sposies for the last week and a half as we went to VA to visit and then made the rest of the trip to SC. We just got a washer so I'm going to try some OS on her probably tomorrow, but we are leaving for Chicago next week so she will be back in sposies for that time bc I don't want to worry about washing her diapers there. I can't wait to try out some of my cute pockets! A lot of the fitteds seem pretty big and I only have one cover so we will probably wait a while before trying those out.
Jill is holding her head up pretty good for the majority of the time. She also smiles socially and I have gotten one or two laughs out of her. She started cooing a bit more over the past few days. She still doesn't have a complete hang of it, but she does it more and more every day and she seems so proud when she hears the sounds come from her mouth! She's very observant and loves to walk around and look at things. I'm hoping she will get a little better at holding her head up so I can buy her an umbrella stroller so she can sit upright in it and look around her. We live in a cute little suburban neighborhood so I'd love to take her on walks!
AFM, I lost all of the baby weight in about two weeks. I have gained about 5lb since that ): I am feeling pretty crummy about myself. Pregnancy definitely f'd up my body pretty nicely! I have a very saggy stomach and I'm just not feeling very sexy. I started the couch to 5k program and I'm thinking of also throwing in the Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred (but I will likely take a bit longer bc of the trip to Chicago). Ideally, I'd like to be super skinny again. Realistically, I'd like to lose some arm fat and maybe some of my thighs and this pooch I have going on. IDK how much I should expect to weigh. I guess 120-125 would sound nice to me, but I know I will likely gain some muscle from exercising so I'm not sure what to expect weight-wise. I am about 5lb less than when I got pregnant which was my highest non-pregnant weight (I got up to 150ish during the last week of my pregnancy), so as long as I don't hit that or higher, I am really okay with any number as long as I am happy with my body.
TTC.. I am so torn about this. Keith wants to wait so our kids will be 2-3 years apart. I can see the advantages of that. A lot of people say that the older kid can "help" with little tasks and will enjoy being a big sister/brother. Jill will have those years to be the only child. But (and this is a huge but for me), my heart is telling me we should try when she's 6-9 months and they'd be closer to a year and a half apart. I think I only want two kids and I want them to be close and I want to get the newborn stage out of the way sooner. Don't get me wrong, I love Jill this age, but I think it'd be easier having kids closer in age. Maybe not. Maybe my brain is just not wired to have sex for only fun lol. Anyways, I am on the mini pill for the time being. I know for sure that I want to at least breastfeed for 6 months before even attempting to get pregnant. I'd like to breastfeed for a year or longer, but I have read that being pregnant can change your milk and some babies don't like it. I think starting to try around 6 months at the earliest gives me a better chance of making it further breastfeeding her. I have really started to love it even more as it gets easier and easier and it just seems natural and part of our routine now. (I guess I should say that I am one of the oh so lucky people that EBFs and got their period back at 6 weeks.. ugh.. but at least I know when I can TTC)
So that turned into a lot longer of a post than I expected lol! I will end with some pics of Jillian!
Basically, we freaking love our house in SC! It's huge and relatively new (5 years old) and we have so much space! I will post pictures as we decorate it, but right now it is covered in boxes and crap that we haven't found a place for! I do have some pics of Jillian's room so far.
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| The white is the door frame so this is to the left as soon as you walk in the door. The movers messed up my mobile so I need to fix that and I need to hang up the pictures in the crib. |
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| I plan to make simple maroon curtains to match the bed skirt |
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| Not sure why this one pic turned out so dark |
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| Yes. This is real life... Top is 0-3mo, bottom is 3-6mo, and the left top is everything bigger plus some nightgowns, sleepsacks, snow suits (that she'll likely never wear.. they were given to us though don't worry!), and some nicer dresses |
So Jillian is 8 weeks today! I don't have a scale that measures lbs and ounces, but today I weighed her (by me stepping on the scale alone and then with her and calculating the difference) and she weights 10.6lb! Breastfeeding is still going great. I have lost most of the feeling in my nipples lol. Sometimes I just let her stay on the boob even after she's done eating bc I love the cuddles and it doesn't hurt anymore!
Jill outgrew her newborn cloth diapers (well the Bumgenius ones she kept peeing out of so I'm assuming they didn't fit or weren't absorbent enough) right before we moved. She has been in sposies for the last week and a half as we went to VA to visit and then made the rest of the trip to SC. We just got a washer so I'm going to try some OS on her probably tomorrow, but we are leaving for Chicago next week so she will be back in sposies for that time bc I don't want to worry about washing her diapers there. I can't wait to try out some of my cute pockets! A lot of the fitteds seem pretty big and I only have one cover so we will probably wait a while before trying those out.
Jill is holding her head up pretty good for the majority of the time. She also smiles socially and I have gotten one or two laughs out of her. She started cooing a bit more over the past few days. She still doesn't have a complete hang of it, but she does it more and more every day and she seems so proud when she hears the sounds come from her mouth! She's very observant and loves to walk around and look at things. I'm hoping she will get a little better at holding her head up so I can buy her an umbrella stroller so she can sit upright in it and look around her. We live in a cute little suburban neighborhood so I'd love to take her on walks!
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| I think I want this stroller. So cute! |
TTC.. I am so torn about this. Keith wants to wait so our kids will be 2-3 years apart. I can see the advantages of that. A lot of people say that the older kid can "help" with little tasks and will enjoy being a big sister/brother. Jill will have those years to be the only child. But (and this is a huge but for me), my heart is telling me we should try when she's 6-9 months and they'd be closer to a year and a half apart. I think I only want two kids and I want them to be close and I want to get the newborn stage out of the way sooner. Don't get me wrong, I love Jill this age, but I think it'd be easier having kids closer in age. Maybe not. Maybe my brain is just not wired to have sex for only fun lol. Anyways, I am on the mini pill for the time being. I know for sure that I want to at least breastfeed for 6 months before even attempting to get pregnant. I'd like to breastfeed for a year or longer, but I have read that being pregnant can change your milk and some babies don't like it. I think starting to try around 6 months at the earliest gives me a better chance of making it further breastfeeding her. I have really started to love it even more as it gets easier and easier and it just seems natural and part of our routine now. (I guess I should say that I am one of the oh so lucky people that EBFs and got their period back at 6 weeks.. ugh.. but at least I know when I can TTC)
So that turned into a lot longer of a post than I expected lol! I will end with some pics of Jillian!
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| Look at those lashes! |
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| Leggings that her Aunt Chancie sent her (: |
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| Helping me unpack |
Sunday, April 14, 2013
One month!
Holy moly. It is really hard to find time with two hands to blog. This is going to be quick bc Jill is likely going to wake up hungry pretty soon. I just wanted to do a quick update anyways.
We are MOVING SOON! I am so stoked about moving out of this terrible townhouse. We have a super huge 2600 (I thought it was 2400) sq ft house with a 2 car garage, fenced in backyard, screened in back patio, 3BR, 2.5BA, FUCKING AMAZING HOUSE! Okay.. I'm all excited and I haven't even seen it yet except for like 6 pictures Keith took. Keith went to SC last week to house hunt and fell in love with the first house he went to see! He is a snob and likes nice things (I'm the cheap one of the two of us) so, if he is this excited about it, then I know it is going to be awesome! The best part is all of the Southern food that I've been missing over the last year and a quarter!
Our plan is for me and Jill to fly down to VA so we can visit with my family and then Keith is going to drive down and pick us up and take us the rest of the way to SC. THEN a few weeks later we are driving to IL to visit his family. I am so excited to see them, but the drive is going to be killer ):
Cloth diapering- We love it. I actually hate prefolds so we don't have near as many diapers as I thought for newborn. I have a very skinny legged child so I have trouble getting some of her diapers to fit around her legs. My favorite diapers are probably the BG XS and then the THX (knock off Lil Joeys) are our second favorite. They're both AIOs, but the BGs are very trim. The THX are pretty big, but have the double gussets which are nice for containing poop. We don't have enough diapers to wash every other day so we are being lazy and using disposables at night. It was easier for me at first because we are using the ones with the color changing line if the diaper is soiled, but now it'd be fine to use any diapers since she at least pees every time she sleeps at night.
Speaking of sleeping at night.. I was so excited when Jill's pedi said I could stop setting alarms every 4 hours at night to feed her when she hit 4 weeks old (last Wed). I had to wake her almost every night since we'd brought her home when that alarm went off. I don't know how long she would have slept otherwise. I was counting down until that 4 weeks so I could get maybe 5-6 hours of sleep. That little butthead hasn't slept more than a 4 hour stretch since she hit 4 weeks.. GAH! 4 hours sounds pretty good, except I am terrible at falling asleep. I sit there after she feeds and rock her or just hold her until I'm positive she's asleep (bc she'll wake up if I move her when she's not dead to the world and then I have to start all over trying to get her to sleep). Then, I put her in her rock n play and listen/watch to make sure she's really asleep for about 10-20min. THEN I lay down and try to sleep (which usually takes me a while anyways bc I have trouble falling asleep), but I am wide awake because I just spent an hour nursing her and changing her diaper and getting her to sleep. I really don't get to sleep the whole stretch that she goes in between feeds. It was tough when Keith was gone bc sometimes he'd rock her to sleep for me after I feed her if I'm having a rough time getting her back to sleep.
Since Keith has been home, she has been going down at night later ): I think I'm going to try a small schedule with her. Mainly just trying to keep her awake from 6 or 7 until 8 or 9 so she goes down at 9 or 10 instead of the 1am that she went down last night and the night before. She used to always go down for her longer stretches at 9:30 or 10 which was great with me! Hopefully, it will work out. If not, I will just deal with it and try again in a few weeks to get her to bed a bit earlier!
Breastfeeding has been going really great lately. I have almost no pain now. It is mainly just discomfort after a session (never during feeding unless she was cluster feeding that day) and my nipples get that chapped feeling if she nurses a lot. She has been eating a lot during the day (like every hour in the evenings) which makes it difficult to leave the house in the evening ): I still love it. I pumped and saved so I could have a night where I had more than a glass of wine. It was totally not worth it! Jill had a lot of trouble with the few bottles we've given her here and there. I think I will save drinking for a true special occasion or drinking with a group bc drinking at home wasn't all that fun and I was stressed trying to get her to eat (most of the milk would come out of her mouth).
Well, those are my updates! Jill has an appointment tomorrow morning and I"m excited to see how much she weighs!
We are MOVING SOON! I am so stoked about moving out of this terrible townhouse. We have a super huge 2600 (I thought it was 2400) sq ft house with a 2 car garage, fenced in backyard, screened in back patio, 3BR, 2.5BA, FUCKING AMAZING HOUSE! Okay.. I'm all excited and I haven't even seen it yet except for like 6 pictures Keith took. Keith went to SC last week to house hunt and fell in love with the first house he went to see! He is a snob and likes nice things (I'm the cheap one of the two of us) so, if he is this excited about it, then I know it is going to be awesome! The best part is all of the Southern food that I've been missing over the last year and a quarter!
Our plan is for me and Jill to fly down to VA so we can visit with my family and then Keith is going to drive down and pick us up and take us the rest of the way to SC. THEN a few weeks later we are driving to IL to visit his family. I am so excited to see them, but the drive is going to be killer ):
Cloth diapering- We love it. I actually hate prefolds so we don't have near as many diapers as I thought for newborn. I have a very skinny legged child so I have trouble getting some of her diapers to fit around her legs. My favorite diapers are probably the BG XS and then the THX (knock off Lil Joeys) are our second favorite. They're both AIOs, but the BGs are very trim. The THX are pretty big, but have the double gussets which are nice for containing poop. We don't have enough diapers to wash every other day so we are being lazy and using disposables at night. It was easier for me at first because we are using the ones with the color changing line if the diaper is soiled, but now it'd be fine to use any diapers since she at least pees every time she sleeps at night.
Speaking of sleeping at night.. I was so excited when Jill's pedi said I could stop setting alarms every 4 hours at night to feed her when she hit 4 weeks old (last Wed). I had to wake her almost every night since we'd brought her home when that alarm went off. I don't know how long she would have slept otherwise. I was counting down until that 4 weeks so I could get maybe 5-6 hours of sleep. That little butthead hasn't slept more than a 4 hour stretch since she hit 4 weeks.. GAH! 4 hours sounds pretty good, except I am terrible at falling asleep. I sit there after she feeds and rock her or just hold her until I'm positive she's asleep (bc she'll wake up if I move her when she's not dead to the world and then I have to start all over trying to get her to sleep). Then, I put her in her rock n play and listen/watch to make sure she's really asleep for about 10-20min. THEN I lay down and try to sleep (which usually takes me a while anyways bc I have trouble falling asleep), but I am wide awake because I just spent an hour nursing her and changing her diaper and getting her to sleep. I really don't get to sleep the whole stretch that she goes in between feeds. It was tough when Keith was gone bc sometimes he'd rock her to sleep for me after I feed her if I'm having a rough time getting her back to sleep.
Since Keith has been home, she has been going down at night later ): I think I'm going to try a small schedule with her. Mainly just trying to keep her awake from 6 or 7 until 8 or 9 so she goes down at 9 or 10 instead of the 1am that she went down last night and the night before. She used to always go down for her longer stretches at 9:30 or 10 which was great with me! Hopefully, it will work out. If not, I will just deal with it and try again in a few weeks to get her to bed a bit earlier!
Breastfeeding has been going really great lately. I have almost no pain now. It is mainly just discomfort after a session (never during feeding unless she was cluster feeding that day) and my nipples get that chapped feeling if she nurses a lot. She has been eating a lot during the day (like every hour in the evenings) which makes it difficult to leave the house in the evening ): I still love it. I pumped and saved so I could have a night where I had more than a glass of wine. It was totally not worth it! Jill had a lot of trouble with the few bottles we've given her here and there. I think I will save drinking for a true special occasion or drinking with a group bc drinking at home wasn't all that fun and I was stressed trying to get her to eat (most of the milk would come out of her mouth).
Well, those are my updates! Jill has an appointment tomorrow morning and I"m excited to see how much she weighs!
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